Saturday, May 5, 2012

The Reluctant Missionary

Is the calling of God always the desire of your heart?  The question alone is almost blasphemous to speak aloud in church.  WHAT?  God has called you and you don't want to go??? 

Let's get real here.  When other women say "It's so nice that God called YOU to missions, but I couldn't go.  I'm a homebody" what they are actually saying is "I WON'T go because I love my home, my family and my comfort." 

Is this a confrontational idea?  Yes.  But Jesus confronts us daily with choices, to obey or disobey.  "If you love Me, you will obey My commandments."  It's very simple, but very very hard.

I am going to Asia on May 25 with my husband Russ.  Do I want to go?  Yes and no. 

I would much rather have a little home of my own, a nest, with a garden and flowers, my taste in decorating, my routine--clean and safe and nice.  I would much rather live in a rural American setting, clean air, pure water, wildlife, and natural beauty.  I would much rather be at home, with 'my things about me', painting beautiful artwork.

Instead, I live in a tiny apartment, struggling with a full time job I dislike.  We do not own a home and probably will never afford one.  I walked with Russ through the past horrible year and a half--tremendous physical losses, hospitals, surgeries, ongoing challenges in his re-learning to walk in metal-and-plastic legs which awkwardly mimic God's wonderful creations.  We still change bandages daily.   We still go to doctors almost every other week.   I am emotionally and physically exhausted.  I will be 70 on my next birthday.  I want to retire.

Instead, I am packing to go to a crowded, noisy country with ragged beggars, deformed lepers, children sold into sexual slavery, and widows thrown out like trash into the streets.  The progressive modernity in high-tech cities hides the stark realities of a nation with the most physical and spiritual poverty in the world.

Why am I going?  I understand, within my core, what Paul said:  "Woe is me if I preach not the Gospel!"  I have held the hands of children whose tiny lives were initially spent in begging for handfuls of food, and not sure if they would have any the next day.  Ragged children who slept on the streets in the rain.  I have prayed with frail, trembling widows who only came up to my shoulders.  I even hugged a leper--a woman about my age who had the disease since she was a teenager.  No one ever hugged her.  Her youth and beauty faded into fingerless stubs of hands and numb feet.  No husband, no children, no home, no family, no friends--cast out of society.  Alone for 50 years. 

How can I NOT go?  I have Christ, the most precious gift in all the world.  They have nothing.  Not even hope.  I MUST go.  I cannot sleep in my little safe, dry apartment, with clean water coming out of the tap, and justify my wealth (yes, wealth) while others live alongside a sewage canal under a tarp.  And have since they were born.  At least they should have the chance to spend eternity with the King.

So, against all my earthly desires, I am going.  Because Christ called me to go.  And I love Him, therefore I will obey Him.  Even if the open sewers make me nauseous and the clamor of the crowds and rickshaws and taxis keep me awake at night.  Sheep without a shepherd.  Unless I bring them to the foot of His Cross.  That is my purpose.  And His.

In His service,
Alice


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Prayer Requests
Pray that Indian Christians will demonstrate the power of the gospel through transformed relationships with their spouses, children, parents and close friends.

Pray for increase in the annual giving and commitments for this upcoming year.
Pray for the men and women who faithfully serve the Lord on the front lines in India.
 
Pray for the Unreached Bairwa of India
Population: 852,000
World Popl: 852,000
Main Language: Dhundari
Main Religion: Hinduism
Bible: None
Status: Least-Reached
Christ-Followers: Few, less than 2%



                          
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